Mummy

My dear sweet mother. My world crumbled when you left. You were my life. I feel lost without you. Nothing seems to make sense anymore. You were such an integral part of me and everything I did revolved around you. Your untimely departure has left a void that can never be filled. A vacuum that feels more like a bottomless pit, a vortex that I can’t seem to pull myself out of. “It’ll get better with time,” they say. I struggle to make sense of that because with each passing day, each passing moment, the pain I feel from your absence seems to deepen and intensify. I miss you so much mama. I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that you’re gone. It feels like a bad dream. Like I’m trapped, caught in an endless time loop. What I wouldn’t give for just 1 more day, 1 more hour, 15 minutes with you. Such an unrelenting tsunami of emotions that oscillates at so many extremes, too numerous to number.

How true the words of the Psalmist. The span of our life is 70 or 80 if one is especially strong. You were so strong mama. Satan threw everything in the book at you and then some. You suffered from a multitude of ailments. Any one in of itself would have caused an ordinary person to crumble. Yet you soldiered on. You never missed a meeting. You were more active in the ministry than most of us with good health. You showed unwavering unrelenting steadfastness in the face of the most trying circumstances and remained faithful until the second you drew your very last breath. We had an argument while you were still in hospital because you insisted on attending our first in-person assembly which I thought was absolutely ridiculous. What a woman, what a mother you were. You singlehandedly raised 3 strong willed, opinionated stubborn and sometimes difficult men after Dad passed. You clothed all 3 of us in so much love. You lived for Jehovah and your children. You ran this race of life with such dignity, such splendidness and incomparable valour and I for my part am so proud to have had the honour of being your son.

I am so blessed to have been able to spend so much time with you before you passed. You taught me everything I know and made me the man I am today. Thank you for the valuable life lessons you taught me. Thank you for teaching me everything I know about life. Thank you for showering me with so much love. Thank you for teaching me how to make the worlds best Jollof rice, egusi soup and efo riro. Thank you for teaching my children, your dear grandchildren about Jehovah when I was too lost in the wilderness to do it myself. Thank you for teaching me what it really means to love Jehovah in words and most importantly in your actions. Such a beautiful soul you were mama.  

I will see you again soon. Rest now my beautiful darling mother. I love you with all my heart.

Henry